.
For dated entries (not
quite daily),
go to my blog, Granny Smith
SPEKING
AND SPELING
Du
u prefur fonetics?
There
was once a college in the middle west that had a winning football team
for the
first time in many years. It was in contention for the regional
conference
title. This had so pleased the alumni
that there had been an unusual numbers of large grants and directed
funds to
the university. The president of the
university was beside himself with joy. And
if the Big Game was won on the coming Saturday,
cinching the title,
much more money could be expected.
The
football coach also was delighted. He
was making a real reputation for himself. Much
of it was due to the brilliant player, Joth
Anon, the most essential player in every game.
There
was also in this university a young English instructor who didn’t
follow the
fortunes of the team, nor would he have changed his standards of
grading even
if he had. Joth Anon was enrolled in
one of his classes. And Joth Anon was
flunking. The instructor issued the
usual warning. This warning meant that
Joth Anon was barred from athletic teams until he made a passing grade
in the
class.
Joth
came to his coach, almost in tears, and explained the situation. His coach, almost in tears, went to the
university president, and explained the situation.
The president and the coach, almost in tears,
went to the English instructor and explained the situation.
The
insrtuctor didn’t seem to understand the gravity of the situation. “I had to flunk Joth; he has never turned in
a single paper, nor has he taken any tests. I’m
not sure that I even know who he is or whether he
has ever attended
the class.”
The
president reminded him that he was soon up for tenure.
“Well,”
the instructor compromised, “I’ll pass him if he turns in one perfect
paper of,
say, a thousand words. I would insist
that the composition be done in my presence so that I know it is his
own work.”
“One
thousand words? Isn’t that excessive?”
“Five
hundred?” the instructor ventured.
“One
hundred?”
“Too
much!”
Finally,
in desperation, the instructor suggessted, “One twelve letter word,
perfectly
spelled?”
“Make it
a six letter word, and you can’t really demand perfect spelling. How about one correct letter in it?”
The
instructor agreed, and they called Joth to the office and explained
what he
would have to do to get a passing grade.
Feeling
utterly defeated, the instructor said, “Spell ‘coffee’.”
Joth
scratched his head thoughtfully for quite a while. Then he started. “K--A--W...” He
thought a little longer; then his face brightened and
he finished,
“P-H-Y.”
More
than one of my four children, those who were not brilliant at spelling,
became
early proponents of simplified English spelling. Now
I’ll admit that when I am in a hurry to
write an urgent message that I’ll sometimes use thru and tho, although
(there’s
another one I sometimes use--altho), but I also correct them if I am,
say,
sending out a manuscript.
In
general, though, I find myself an opponent of any tampering with the
English language. Our heritage of words
from different roots
makes for a clarity of meaning that could be easily lost by
simplification.
In other
words, I believe in a wordw-r-i-g-h-t’s
r-i-g-h-t to w-r-i-t-e
about any strange r-i-t-e that catches her fancy. One
of my sons solved the problem of spelling
these same-sounding words by using w-r-i-g-h-t-e
for any one of them, undoubtedly with the hope that by covering all
bases he
would please his teacher.
Now, it
might be possible to discern the meaning of a phrase with this
spelling--a wordrite’s rite to rite about any strange
rite. Even so, I don’t know how the
spelling simplifier would manage the a-n-g-e
sound in s-t-r-a-n-g-e, which is
hardly a simple phonetic pronunciation.
There
are many other words that would have ambiguous meanings if spelled
phonetically--site and sight, for
instance. “The Sierras are a wonderful s-i-t-e.” Does this mean
that you should take your
camera there or that it’s a good place to build your summer cabin? (The simplified spelling purist would
probably write that as “thu Sieras ar a
wundurful site”)
If one
goes to the s-e-e, is he at the ocean
or visiting the bishop?
“That
second-hand store specializes in r-u-f-f
clothing.” Does this mean rough canvas
jeans for scrambling over rocks, or does it mean formal clothes with a
ruff on
the tuxedo shirt?
And what
about those two words, error and errer
which most of us, rightly or
wrongly, pronounce alike? How does one
distinguish the mistake from the person who makes the mistake?
And if foot is simplified to fut, would boot be distinguishable from but
or butt?
Yes, I
know that it’s hard for an elementary school student to master the
tough
lessons of spelling rough, cough, though, through, thought
and bough.
(April 19,2007) I think that this will be
the last dated
blog-like entry on this page. Instead I will add a permanent
notation
right under the tiger that such updates are on my blog, Granny
Smith. The tiger will continue to stalk. This page will be reserved
for stories, essays, etc. that really do express my philosophy, if only
bit by bit.
(April 10, 2007) We had our Easter feast
here day before
yesterday. Grandson Byron Shock was here, up from Santa Cruz, as well
as
Sterling, Joni and Roxanne from San Jose. As I explained on March 27, I
was unable for several weeks to upload to either dragonhaven.net or
Phaseable.com
(Otto's site). Byron, Ph.D. in artificial intelligence, had had the
same
experience with the same web host. He set me ujp with an alternative
way
to upload to my site - one he intends to use himself. I was
relieved
to find that it wasn't somehow my fault that Otto and I could not
upload
to our sites!
(March 27, 2007) For three weeks this site
(all of Dragonhaven,
not just this page)) has refused to upload. I have asked Cedric to look
into it so perhaps this will be web-available soon, Just to show
you what I can find on the web, here is a steal from a dragon site of
an
animation of my favorite animal. Of course it would look better on a
black
page!
O.K. I'll admit that I'm addicted to the beautifully animated
animals
at the Wilson site above. Isn't this one great? 
(February
10, 2007) Every morning when I awaken I look up at my bulletin board
thumbtacked
with pictures, letters, notes, miscellaneous addresses and URLs that I
intend to access someday. Not to mention my calendar, several peace
pins,
a stuffed salamander and a stuffed turtle. There are snapshots of my
children
and grandchildren and great-grandchildren at assorted ages. Prominent
among
the pictures is a large postcard with a NASA photo that never fails to
give me goosebumps: earthrise on the moon. There half-earth is, blue
and
green and golden and swirled with veils of white cloud. I hope anyone
reading
this has seen Al Gore's An Inconvenient Truth. What we are
doing
to earth with our wasteful and careless consumption of energy and the
consequent
buildup of atmospheric carbon dioxide is unconscionable. Here's another
of my borrowed web animations (http://www.fg-a.com/animations.htm).
This shiny litle ball is not beautiful like our living earth, but
it IS cute 